The Passing of Our Parents

It is inevitable, the loss of our parents.  Someone so important in our lives that we would not even be here, were it not for them.  They influence our lives even when we think we will never be anything like them.  I find it interesting how this loss can influence and change the rest of our lives and change the course of the path we are currently on.  Somehow, we lose sight of our goals, our hopes and our ideals during this morning period.

My first experience with the death of a parent happened when I was thirteen years old.  My father was killed in a farming accident.  I was totally sure that my world had ended.  And, yes, my world, as I knew it had ended.  However, my life continued, changed and was never the same.

My Dad and Mom (and me) mid 1960's

With the passing of my father, I was forced to 'grow up' much sooner than I had ever anticipated.  Even though we all must 'grow up' sooner or later, a little later might have been more preferable. 

Now life continued, I married, had three kids and went about life as normally as possible.  And although I would always find that I was missing a part of my heart, I knew that I would survive. 

In 1988, my husband lost his Mother.  It was also a very traumatic death and it too made a huge impact on the entire family.

My Mother-in-law and Father-in-law

My husband was a young 30 years old and he missed his mother dearly.

Many years have passed since we had both loss a parent.  However in 2007, my dear Mother lost her life to cancer.  I stayed by her side for two months - while she proved what a strong, grace-filled, loving woman she truly was.  My Mother , my best friend, is dearly missed.

My Mom

My Mom (right) and her twin sister.  I was so lucky to have two Moms!

This brings us to present day and the final loss of our last parent.  My father-in-law passed away last week.  Not an easy death for a proud man and very hard for his son, my husband.  This passing was even made harder by the miles we have between our home here in Kentucky and our old family life in Nebraska.  This will take some time, time to heal and time accept.

My father-in-law - rode his motorcycle to Sturgis Week at the age of 80.

So now, here we are, in our 50's and I sometimes feel as though I am an orphan.  I no longer have that security of having sage advice at my disposal.  I miss that!  It's really hard to always be the grown up the one that needs to have all the answers.  But, I am trying, although it is baby steps, and I don't always have all the answers, I am trying.  I pray that my husband and I will have the knowledge,  strength, understanding and patience that our parents showed us.